The air is tense. I can't breathe.

So.

I should be working on homework right now. I really really really should.

Forget hell week, November is pretty much gonna be hell month. I've been back for one week, I have so much due next week and the week after, it's rediculous. And then there's one more week, more things, and then... Then I'm in placement for three weeks.

I really miss last year. I had... time. Between classes, throughout most of December.....

I have the same two weeks I had when I was in highschool or elementary school this year. Which I suppose makes sense, it's what I'll have when I'm... actually a teacher.

But yeah.


I want a break now. I want a week. And I'd probably totally waste that, I don't want to admit it, but it's true. I just want to run away for a week and have fun and not have to worry about homework or anything.

But instead I have to wait another 40 days. (My last day before Christmas break is exactly 40 days from now. heh.)

I need to get out of this and get through it. And I know I can... it just..........
I want time. I want to have FUN.
I don't get to do enough of that, especially face-to-face, lately.

I've also been complaining about the lack of SO again lately.
...and then a guy hit on me on a bus, apparently me saying I don't like the taste of alcohol is one of the smartest things he's ever heard...... it was a little awkward.


...of course, I do have interests, but I'd rather not even go there. Because I'm pretty sure it's all unrequited and... I'm ok with that.
Crazy C-chan.....





Dotcon's next weekend. Hopefully going on the Saturday. Hopefully heading up early-ish, because I dunno if there will be Hetalia cosplay registration past noon, and Saturday reg opens at 10.
Hopefully won't be going alone, either. I don't want to be alone for that entire trip.....
And I'm probably transiting it, because two_powers probably isn't going to be going. So I REALLY don't want to be alone that long.

Next weekend is also more than one birthday. Which should be interesting.

And the Santa Claus Parade.

And a ton of assignments to get though. Argh.

Not giving up dotcon. I need a con. I need a day like that. I really do. I really really do.



Also: My grandfather's in the hospital.
He's got backpain and can't walk. They're thinking it's a pinched word... but I've also heard things about stress fractures (cracks) and a few other things, I think. But he's been there since yesterday. And he's not getting out today, that's for sure.


...

I don't need this. I really don't.

The only upside is that I have today to work on things, which I wasn't supposed to have. Mind, I'm still not being able to concentrate well enough.

I also need to go to bed at more decent times. I really, really need to. And I know it.



...also, getting ready to apply for JET for next year.
Mom's wondering how I'm going to afford it.
I'm wondering how I'm going to afford it, and how I'll manage to survive socially... (I'm scared about how it will effect me on both sides of the pacific, how sad is that?)


Need to be happier. Argh. Argharghargh.


In unrelated news? There was a murder in New Gen. I didn't recognize it from the outside, but then I saw the inside and was like "it's that New Gen. Wow." And..................... yeah.


.......


I need hugs and/or fun times and/or someone to come and help me with my homework or something. *breathes*



PS: I really wish that I had more money/time/confidence to put into my cosplay....

(no subject)

DRAWME!



Dunno why I did this, historically no one ever does these things when I post....

Meh. It's there anyway. In case anyone wants to.