Not forgetting something that is probably quite ineffable
Okay. I am probably going to sound unusually pessimistic/moody in this post. I apologize for this. I just need to get this out.
She's not responding.
She was on Sunday, and was weakly doing so yesterday. She's not today. That doesn't mean she can't hear us, we have no proof either way on that. She just isn't responding.
I am one of the few people who hasn't cried yet. My sister did. I've seen all my aunts and my mom in tears, and I'm not sure about my uncle. My grandpa has. My great aunt took it one step further and actually collapsed! She had to be taken down to the emergency room. (Don't worry, she's fine, just was a little shocked, and low on sodium.) I haven't. I've managed to stay pretty optimistic and happy, like normal. Serious when talking about it, yes. But I haven't broken down. And I don't plan to any time soon.
Still, I need to rant. This is my outlet, because talking is my way of dealing with things half the time.
Anyways... yeah. I'm an optimist. I always have been and (hopefully) always will be. Still, I'm beginning to really lose hope. I don't think she's going to make it. It'd be great if she did, but... I have a random feeling that it's going to be Thursday night.
Please let me be wrong.
Do you know what makes this especially hard for most of us? 1)my grandparents live with me. they have for the past 6 years. 2)she's been in Florida since Boxing Day. So... until this all started happening... none of us had seen her (besides Grandpa) in like... 2 and a half months! I guess in a way that also makes it easier, but at the same time... we haven't had the last few months to make memories with her. I wish we had been given that chance. Mind you, if it had played out like that, I'd probably be wishing for the situation we're in now.
*sigh* I guess that's all I have to say for now. Just... please, as I said to Jen, don't worry about me. It's my mom's generation I'm worried for.
( the customary quizzy cut )
Random fact: Apparently over 2500 left handed people a year are killed from using products made for right handed people. Remind me to stay away from that can opener over there...
She's not responding.
She was on Sunday, and was weakly doing so yesterday. She's not today. That doesn't mean she can't hear us, we have no proof either way on that. She just isn't responding.
I am one of the few people who hasn't cried yet. My sister did. I've seen all my aunts and my mom in tears, and I'm not sure about my uncle. My grandpa has. My great aunt took it one step further and actually collapsed! She had to be taken down to the emergency room. (Don't worry, she's fine, just was a little shocked, and low on sodium.) I haven't. I've managed to stay pretty optimistic and happy, like normal. Serious when talking about it, yes. But I haven't broken down. And I don't plan to any time soon.
Still, I need to rant. This is my outlet, because talking is my way of dealing with things half the time.
Anyways... yeah. I'm an optimist. I always have been and (hopefully) always will be. Still, I'm beginning to really lose hope. I don't think she's going to make it. It'd be great if she did, but... I have a random feeling that it's going to be Thursday night.
Please let me be wrong.
Do you know what makes this especially hard for most of us? 1)my grandparents live with me. they have for the past 6 years. 2)she's been in Florida since Boxing Day. So... until this all started happening... none of us had seen her (besides Grandpa) in like... 2 and a half months! I guess in a way that also makes it easier, but at the same time... we haven't had the last few months to make memories with her. I wish we had been given that chance. Mind you, if it had played out like that, I'd probably be wishing for the situation we're in now.
*sigh* I guess that's all I have to say for now. Just... please, as I said to Jen, don't worry about me. It's my mom's generation I'm worried for.
( the customary quizzy cut )
Random fact: Apparently over 2500 left handed people a year are killed from using products made for right handed people. Remind me to stay away from that can opener over there...